5 Things That Help Me Fall Asleep

For as far back as I can remember, I have always been a bit of a night owl. Even when I was very young, the 9:00 PM bedtime that my parents had set for me didn't work very well, as I would only end up lying in bed awake for hours, unable to sleep. Mind you, this was without having a smartphone, tablet, or laptop within my reach to keep me up all night; all I really had was maybe a flashlight so I could try to read a book under the covers. I had a TV in my room, but my parents would have known if I had turned the TV on, so that wasn't an option. Most nights, I would just lay in bed bored, until I was finally able to fall asleep around midnight or so. Needless to say that by 8th grade, when my bedtime was no longer enforced, and I was allowed to set my own as long as I didn't make a habit of being late for school, I did not stick to that 9:00 PM bedtime. I knew that I wasn't going to be able to sleep if I went to bed that early anyway, and it didn't take very long for my personal "lights-out" time for a school night to get moved to midnight. I am sure that there are people out there who are screaming at the very thought of that, which is actually fair given the fact that I still had a hard time falling asleep at that time. There were times that I was lying in bed, still trying to fall asleep when my alarm went off. I can't even begin to explain how good it felt to take a long nap the second I got home from school; although let's be real, that nap is probably what made it impossible to sleep at night. 

I could actually go on and on about the horrendous sleeping habits that I've had throughout my life. For the longest time, you could have sworn that I was legitimately nocturnal, and I would often half-joke that I was nocturnal. I was often going to bed when most people would be waking up on the days they chose to sleep in and waking up in the evening. With that said, I'd like to say that if you're on a similar nocturnal sleep schedule, and it works for you, I'm not about to judge you for it. Seriously, you do what works for you. However, while I am most certainly a night owl by nature, I also like mornings, believe it or not, and all my life, I've wanted to be a morning person. And, with that said, I've actually successfully found a way to be a night owl and a morning person simultaneously by going to bed at midnight and waking up at 7:00 AM. However, if I want that 7:00 AM wake-up time to work for me, and not leave me feeling tired, crabby, and unproductive all-day, I have to find a way to actually fall asleep soon after hopping into bed. And when you have a brain that seems to not be able to shut off at night, and all your thoughts start racing the second you dive under the covers, falling asleep isn't always an easy task. Especially when you get bit by the creative bug within an hour of your bedtime. There's actually a wide variety of thoughts that tend to keep me up that I can go on and on about, as you can probably tell. But, that's enough of my sleepy-time woes.

Ever since I discovered the ASMR community on YouTube in 2017, I have been absolutely obsessed with ASMR videos, and I am not at all embarrassed to admit that. Although, it seems that watching and listen to ASMR has become more and more "socially acceptable" over the last couple of years, so if you love ASMR, I don't think anyone would really judge you for it anyway. Anyway, if you've somehow never heard of ASMR, or you have yet to watch an ASMR video, I have to say that you are big-time missing out, and I highly recommend that you at least give it a chance. With that said, I will admit that if you've never really watched an ASMR video before, it can seem a little bit weird at first, as the ASMRtist is often speaking softly, whispering, or not speaking at all as they make different sounds with various objects. I also have to admit that there are quite a lot of ASMR videos that are a bit on the weirder side, but this isn't exactly a phenomenon that's exclusive to ASMR. Anyway, my point is, when you watch ASMR, do keep in mind that these videos are usually intended sleep and relaxation, hence why ASMRtists tend to speak quietly, and why the focus is mostly on soft sounds and/or hypnotic visuals. I could honestly go on and on about why you should give ASMR a chance (if you haven't already), but to sum it up, it's just hella relaxing.

Anyway, while I typically listen to ASMR during the day, as it's actually fantastic to listen to when you want to be productive, most ASMRtists intend for their videos to be watched at bedtime as you're getting ready to go to sleep. As a matter of fact, it's actually a compliment to tell an ASMRtist that you fell asleep while watching or listening to their videos. That being said, I have to say that ASMR videos have been beyond helpful in helping me fall asleep on nights where I would not otherwise have been able to shut my mind off to fall asleep. ASMR has also helped me to fall asleep rather quickly on quite a few occasions. With all of that said, I can confirm that, even if I don't always get ASMR tingles, ASMR videos are a phenomenal (and natural) sleep aide, and they are absolutely marvelous for relaxation. Personally, I consider watching ASMR videos to be a form of meditation, and one of the many ways that you can use modern technology for self-care. So while I know that not everyone enjoys ASMR, it is worth giving it a fair chance before writing it off as weird. Especially as there are so many ASMRtists and types of ASMR videos that you are bound to find something that you enjoy and find relaxing as long as you keep an open mind.

If you'd like to watch a little bit of ASMR right now, my best friend Mari recently started an ASMR channel on YouTube, and her content is absolutely amazing. Here is one of her videos if you'd like to take a moment to relax right now...

Can I be honest with you for a second? Using counting as a "hack" to fall asleep at night was actually an inadvertent discovery that I made trying to get myself out of bed in the morning. Long story short, I'm rarely ever thrilled to get out of bed in the morning, as I'm sure that many people can relate to, and I would always try to put off getting out of bed for as long as I could. One of the ways that I would put off getting out of bed would be to tell myself that I was going to get out of bed on the count of 10, 20, 50, or whatever number popped into my head, and let me just say, this was quite an effective way to delay getting out of bed in the morning. As a matter of fact, it was a bit too effective, as I'd end up falling asleep before I finished counting. That being said, if you're looking for an effective way to actually get yourself out of bed, counting to 10 or doing any sort of a countdown probably isn't it. However, once it occurred to me that counting rarely fails to put back to sleep in the morning, and I remembered that people count sheep to fall asleep at night, I realized that counting could actually be a powerful tool to help me sleep at night. So, rather than telling myself that I'd get out of bed at the count of whatever number in the morning, I decided to try counting myself to sleep at night instead. And I must say, counting is quite an effective method for helping yourself fall asleep at night; I suppose this is why people suggest counting sheep when you can't sleep.

For the record, you obviously don't have to count actual sheep in your head; you can mentally tally up anything you'd like. That being said, if you'd prefer to count puppies or kittens over sheep, then mentally tally up puppies or kittens. Honestly, you don't have to count anything specific at all, and you can opt to focus solely on the numbers themselves. I know that it may seem a bit boring to think about numbers, but that's the point, as you are actually trying to bore yourself to sleep by counting. After all, it's a lot easier to fall asleep when you're bored than when you're excited. Am I right? Counting gives your brain something tedious but relatively undemanding to concentrate on and can help distract you from those racing thoughts that are keeping you up at night. As a matter of fact, it's been said that counting is a great way to relieve anxious thoughts in general. So if you find that your thoughts are keeping you up at night, or if you're feeling anxious, perhaps you may find it helpful to slowly count to 10, 20, 50, 100, or however high you believe to be necessary, or until you fall asleep. You can also choose to count backward from any number if you wish; it's entirely up to you. Personally, when I am lying in bed counting, I also like to take some deep breaths and tally up the breaths that I'm taking; and I must say that the combination of counting and deep breathing is magnificent for relaxation.

I have a confession to make; sometimes, allowing myself to actually rest is much easier said than done. Honestly, I need to set a strict time to stop working and trying to be super productive, as I sometimes find myself still trying to be productive up until it's time to go to bed. I'd also be lying if I said that I've never stayed up beyond my bedtime to work on something that could have easily waited until the next day. Sometimes I think I might actually benefit from using a website blocking extension to prevent myself from trying to do work after a set time, even though most people use such extensions to stay productive. Seriously, I have that difficult of a time figuring out when to stop working sometimes. Can anyone else relate? That being said, while I am sure that many people may view it as a good thing to not be able to stop oneself from working or trying to be productive, it can wreak havoc on my mental health when I neglect to balance work, play, and life in general. Working late into the night also tends to make it difficult for me to fall asleep, even if I get to bed on time, as it prevents me from winding down, and it keeps my mind active. Although admittedly, some of my favorite self-care activities also make it difficult for me to wind down at night, so I can't say that my work is the only culprit in preventing me from resting at night.

Anyway, my point is, to give myself the best chance of getting a good night's sleep, it's necessary to give myself at least an hour to rest and wind down before bed. However, I do prefer to shoot for at least three hours of restful self-care before bed, meaning that with my 12:00 AM bedtime, I like to halt all activities that keep my mind active and start winding down around 9:00 PM. This means that as 9:00 PM approaches, I need to find a stopping point to whatever I'm doing, whether I'm working, playing video games, indulging in a book with an exciting plot, binge-watching a show on Netflix, or whatever else may be holding my attention. This certainly isn't to say that I have to sit in silence and twiddle my thumbs in the last couple of hours before bed. Sometimes, my actually mind races when I sit in silence and don't find a way to stay at least somewhat occupied. However, when it comes to my "wind-down" time at night, there are definitely some activities that I like to avoid, and others that I will certainly allow...

It probably goes without saying that the more comfortable you are, the more likely you are to fall asleep faster and have a better night's sleep, or at least, I know that I can't argue with that. With that said, as I'm getting ready for bed, I like to ensure that my sleeping environment is as comfortable as I can possibly make it and that I'll be as comfortable as I can possibly be once I hop under the covers. For me, this primarily means ensuring that my bed is made and that my room is tidy before I shut out the lights. I also have to say that pleasant smells really help me sleep, so I also like to either diffuse some lavender essential oil at bedtime or wear a soft floral perfume to bed. As someone who loves sleeping with a lot of heavy blankets, I also like to open the window to let in some of the cooler air during the Spring and Fall time. There are actually quite a few things on my personal comfort checklist for bedtime, and I know that everyone's comfort checklist will be a little bit different. Honestly, it's all a matter of preferences, but here are a few factors you can consider in terms of your own comfort when it's time to start getting ready for bed...

I know that, sometimes, getting a good night's rest can seem a lot easier said than done, and it can even seem nearly impossible to fall asleep on some nights. Not all of us were blessed with the ability to fall asleep seemingly the second we close our eyes, no matter where we're at, especially not those of us who are night owls. However, the fact that it can be rather difficult to fall asleep at night doesn't negate the fact that getting a good night's rest is essential to both our mental and physical wellbeing, not to mention our general mood and productivity. I know first-hand how crabby I can get when I don't get enough sleep, and how hard it is to do anything productive when I'm exhausted from sleep deprivation, and it can be quite a challenge to push through it. So with that said, finding a way to get that much-needed rest is more than necessary, and luckily there are quite a few things that can help, and many of them are little things that won't cost you very much if anything at all. So perhaps, before reaching for the melatonin, you could try doing something as simple as turning on an ASMR video and taking a few deep breaths; or counting backward from 100. Or maybe you could change up your bedtime routine and allow for more rest in the last hour or so of your night. There are a lot of little things that you can do to improve your chances of falling asleep naturally and getting a great night's sleep.

What are some of the things that help you fall asleep at night? How do you optimize your sleeping environment and your bedtime routine to give you the best chance of a good night's rest as possible? I'd love to hear your thoughts, as well as some of your own "hacks" for falling asleep.